cloudsSo, twice this week, I woke up with great intentions and a detailed plan of what I wanted and needed to do. And, twice this week, everything I set out to do failed miserably. I woke up late both times. I had a migraine one of those days. The events I wanted to attend were cancelled or I just didn’t feel up to going due to the migraine. There was a price increase on something I needed to buy (the sale had ended the day before). I couldn’t find the notes I needed for a meeting to discuss my upcoming plans for a project. I decided to go to one of my favorite places for hot wings. I got sick later! My laptop is slowly crashing and now, it shuts off and restarts. Unfortunately, it shut down at a time that I had not saved everything.

One of the reasons that those who’ve been abused decide to go back to their abusers is that they’ve reached a point of frustration. Nothing seems to be going right. No matter how hard they try or how much effort they put into connecting with the right people, their needs are just not being met. So, how do you encourage someone who’s on the fence about what to do? And, if that someone is you, how do you keep going when giving up seems like a much better option.

While there is no one clear cut, simple answer to this, I’ll give you the one that has made the most sense for me regarding giving up-DON’T! Please stay the course. Something IS working and that something is YOU! We have to remind ourselves and others that it takes a lot of strength and courage to recognize and leave an unhealthy place and head into a path of uncertainty. If we have the strength to leave, then we have the strength to keep going. We may have to do some reassessing of what’s not working. Sometimes, there are situations beyond our control. Other times, we have to be more trusting and transparent with ourselves and others and ask for help or more help if necessary. It’s not about pride. It’s about progress. I will be doing another post specifically on that later. The point is, our lives are a series of peaks and valleys. It is in the valley that we learn our strength. Our legs get stronger. Our minds become more creative. But, that only happens if you fight for it. It takes work. It’s easy to give up, give in or go back. But, you already know what that looks and feels like. So, continue to push forward, ask for help, change your circle of influence and don’t give up. Eventually, you’ll reach your peak. And, when you encounter another series of valley moments, you’ll be able to withstand them because you will have the experience of knowing that you’ve been there before and lived through it.