Last week, I had the pleasure of spending time with Mildred Muhammad. While many around the globe know her as the ex-wife of the DC Sniper and being an amazing speaker and author, I am pleased to say that I have a different type of relationship with her.
I am proud to call her my sister, friend, colleague and fellow warrior in bringing education, awareness and overall change regarding issues related to domestic violence and sexual assault. When I first reached out to her, it was to be a guest on our nonprofit’s radio show, Boots on the Ground. Keep in mind, I’ve been following her for years. But, because of her celebrity, I was actually afraid to reach out to her, fearing that we were too small and she would not have time. But, because I do not believe that we should live or operate in the spirit of fear, I decided to go ahead and contact her. She was soooooo easy going and personable. I felt a real sense of conviction come over me. She was quite humble and graciously accepted the invitation to be our special guest.
But, it is what happened afterwards that makes knowing her more meaningful for me. She made me feel comfortable to share things I hadn’t shared with others. There are times when you just feel the need to keep your thoughts guarded, even when you need to share them. She advised me. She encouraged me. She corrected me. She reminded me. She made time for me. I knew from that moment on, I had a genuine connection with her. It wasn’t about social media likes or bragging about ‘who you know’. I know if I need her or just want to catch up, laugh or vent, I can do it. And, I believe she knows the same is true for her with me.
So, even though she was busy with speaking, workshops, book signings and radio interviews last week, she made certain we spent time together. It was not advertised. No selfies were taken to be posted.lol Just two sisters who share a foundation of faith and like minded spirits chatting. And, if you’re reading this and have not yet ordered the book, you can do so using this link: http://www.mildredmuhammad.com/publications.html
I had the absolute pleasure of being the Keynote speaker for this year’s Project STAND event. Project STAND is an annual fundraising event designed to provide awareness and resources to victims/survivors of domestic violence and the community at large. I’ve been fortunate to attend almost every year. And, our nonprofit organization, Walking Into A New Life, Inc., has benefited from the proceeds of the event. This year, I was privileged with the task of being the Keynote speaker.
In my address, I wanted to make sure attendees understood the importance of giving, being a good servant leader and being mindful of the language they use when addressing victims of abuse. I also stressed the importance of seeking help, counseling and trusting the judicial system. Among other things, talked about not simply encouraging survivors to just leave an abusive relationship without a plan, as that plan will help to determine when and how they can do it safely.
As always, we had a great time! Food, fun, fellowship and outstanding entertainment. If you didn’t attend this year, I suggest you make plans to come out NEXT year.
This weekend, I had the privilege of receiving an award from the House of Mtenzi who sponsors The Stone Awards. This was their 22nd year hosting the event. Local community leaders and those who have national ties but local roots are honored in a number of categories. The award I received is called the C.U.R.E.S. Eben Shero Award. CURES stands for Colors Uniting Representing Every Stone. I dedicated the award to my Dad & Paternal Grandmother, both of whom raised me, and my children. My grandmother believed in order to be a good leader, you have to be committed to being a good servant. My father used to say it’s hard by the yard, but a cinch by the inch. My children have been part of my healing and community process since I made the decision to speak up and out regarding abuse and assault. In order to start addressing the community, I had to start at home and begin to present a sense of awareness and accountability with my own family. I am dedicated to bringing hope, awareness, education and action to issues surrounding domestic violence and its many intersections.
As we continue to recognize October as National Domestic Violence Awareness month, I am reminded of one of the single biggest questions I’m asked, Why Doesn’t She Leave? I decided to write a few of my thoughts and submit them to The Memphis Flyer. I’m pleased to share my thoughts were featured in this week’s Viewpoint section of their newspaper. I am hopeful that those who read it will find it to provide a more intimate look at the barriers individuals affected by domestic violence are facing. I also hope it inspires others to become more involved in establishing and maintaining solutions to help our brothers and sisters who need help, support, guidance and resources.
For the past six years, the Whitehaven Public Library has hosted an event called Girls Night Out on Domestic Violence. I have had the privilege to facilitate it all six years. The first year, I was asked to facilitate with another person from another organization. The following year, I was asked to do it alone and have been doing so ever since. I always look forward to it, and I always have a great time.
Donna Parnell Windham is over programs at the library. She wanted to start GNO because of the things she saw and heard from the people, specifically young women, who frequent the library. We were fortunate enough to have the opportunity to be featured on Local 24 to talk about the event and our passion for the work. Many thanks to news anchor Amy Speropoulos for a great interview and her caring spirit. The TV interview is here: https://www.facebook.com/LocalMemphisLive/videos/1962730890670018/
