My 10 Year Milestone: On this day, ten years ago, I took my life back and became a DV survivor. To some, this may not mean a lot. There will be some who I KNOW will question why I’m sharing this at all. But, if you had known me the way that my children knew me 10 years ago, you’d know I was holistically broken with no real plan of how to care or love me or them the way we all deserved. Today, I can honestly say I love myself & do my best to make sure my children know they have my love & support. I am a happy, healthy wife, mom, MiMi, entrepreneur, executive director, national speaker, 2x Best selling author and committed to helping the community in the way it has been given to me to do. I’ve met the most beautiful people who’ve helped/supported me along the way (celebrities, and more importantly, ordinary people like me). I have never desired to be popular. I do, however, desire to be impactful. I want to have to heart of service like Edna with the smile & realness of John (my grandma & daddy).
If you’ve done anything (marriage, a job, a business, etc.) consistently for 10 years, you know it takes dedication, discipline, consistency, strong belief and your why (personal/professional) has to be stronger than any opposition you face (family, friends, colleagues, your own self doubt). It’s encouraging for others to see, hear and know.
The University of Memphis recently hosted its annual Title IX Summit. Title IX is a comprehensive federal law that prohibits discrimination on the basis of sex in any federally funded education program or activity. To learn more about the history of Title IX , it’s importance, compliance and more by reading here: https://www.justice.gov/crt/overview-title-ix-education-amendments-1972-20-usc-1681-et-seq
I enjoyed the opportunity to be one of the presenters. I was asked to present on the cycle of abuse. It’s important for those working with students understand the dynamics of abuse, as more and more employees are coming in contact with individuals being abused. They need to be able to recognize the signs in order to best serve their needs when issues arise. They also need to understand the mindset of those who are going through abuse. By doing so, it will help them to have a better understanding of their struggles and in some cases, help to remove certain perceptions. Students will feel more comfortable with reporting, understanding their rights and having adequate support and referrals for additional programs and services.
I’m excited about my latest accomplishment. I signed up to receive requests for writers on various topics through Help A Reporter Out, also known as HARO. I saw a request for blogging insights and decided to submit my information. I was pleasantly surprised to receive an email stating my insights were accepted and included in the article.
It was my honor to serve as the keynote speaker for Fresh Touch Publicity’s Annual HERoine Awards. The theme was Walking the Paved Road. Seven women were honored who have successfully overcome obstacles from all walks of life. For some, it was abuse. For others, it was health and wellness issues. For all, it was an opportunity for them to be honored for not only overcoming, but serving in the community and paying it forward to help others to do the same.
The program also served as a way to pay homage to women who’ve paved the way before us. Without their sacrifices, we would not be able to enjoy many of the rights and freedoms that we now experience. There was a magazine reveal, delicious brunch and tons of celebration and reflection.
TeeJay Jefferson, owner of Fresh Touch Publicity is a wonderful young woman whose vision, spirit and desire to uplift women goes far beyond her years. I am happy to have served in this capacity and given the chance to share my insights in such an honorable way.
April is Sexual Assault Awareness month. All month, I have been participating in different activities in honor of the month and to help spread awareness & education. Each year, I also strive to do something new and challenging as a way of establishing my personal and professional growth. Most people that know me tend to associate me with being a survivor of domestic violence. And, while that is what I started my journey speaking about and my primary focus, I am also a survivor of sexual assault. I participated in a 5k race against sexual assault, and it was one of the best experiences I’ve have.
The race was hosted by the Memphis and Shelby County Domestic and Sexual Violence Council. There were 111 individuals who signed up, with 87 people who actually ran. Of the racers, I was #44 overall (which is actually my current age) and my race tag was #45 which is what I will be on my birthday this year. I’m quite proud of myself for pushing through the pain and for not being discouraged with seeing so many others run past me. There’s some great significance in my last sentence. I pushed through the physical and emotional pain of a toxic relationship to get to this point of holistic peace in my life. I’ve learned to run my own race, recognizing that everyone’s journey and experiences are different. Therefore, the way that one responds to how they address it will be different.
The most important two points I want to make in this short blog is one, to challenge yourselves to do something new and two, operate within your comfort zone. I was not in the best physical shape to run this race, but I showed up, competed and finished. I did it in 42 minutes. I learned a lot about my mental and physical self. I established a foundation for myself and will continue to exercise my mind, body and spirit. I will continue to grow stronger and continue to endure. This is the overall attitude that I have as I continue my journey as a speaker, trainer, author, radio show host, wife, mother and survivor of domestic violence and sexual assault.
